Thursday, 12 February 2009

♥ Things I Would Rather Do Than Celebrate Valentine's Day ♥


  1. Be locked in a room for all eternity with only a copy of 'P.S. I Love You' for company


  2. Find that my interior monologue had been replaced by Bono's


  3. Wake up to find that I had travelled back in time and was now The Elephant Man, John Merrick


  4. Work as Naomi Campbell's maid


  5. Be adopted by Michael Jackson


  6. Join a gym


  7. Watch Adam Sandler's entire body of 'work'


  8. Have a radio that could only pick up Jo Whiley


  9. Touch a live fish


  10. Have every single news bulletin for the rest of eternity read by Natasha Kaplinsky - if any newsperson deserves to be covering cat fashion shows, Anchorman-style, it is she


  11. Read a book written entirely in textspeak - OMGZ LOL HOTT !!!11!!!1!!


  12. Watch Pete Doherty perform live


  13. Legally change my name so that it was spelt Jhessyka or some other unconventional monstrosity


  14. Listen to Nickelback's entire back catalogue


  15. Become a Scientologist


  16. Have another dream in which I was marrying The Leprechaun (Gaz, I hold you fully responsible for this!)


  17. Do another law degree


  18. Watch nothing but ITV1 for the rest of my natural life


  19. Hack all my limbs off


  20. Be in McCormack's drama class again


  21. Pick the winnning lottery numbers only to realise I had forgotten to buy a ticket


  22. Appear on Maury Povich admitting that I had 75 potential babydaddys


  23. Give Hallmark Greetings PLC all of my money - BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT YOU FUCKING WANT, ISN'T IT?! *Exhales*


  24. Attend J's sure-to-be-fantabulous 21st :)


This is a lovely song though:

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